Today is the first day of the 2008 World Snooker Championships. I am sitting here with the BBC Sport Player open in the top right corner of my screen. For your information, it’s 0 - 0, John Higgins vs. Matthew Stevens, in the first frame of the first round.


How exciting!


For the next two weeks (and a bit) we’re going to have lots of men bent over tables. What could be better?


There is a small side-show every year regarding the Women’s World Snooker Championship. No doubt this is someone’s idea of a drive for parity. Haven’t we already got enough women bending over tables?


In every cop movie, gangster movie, any American teen movie, there are plenty of women, usually waitresses, bending over tables. And in skimpy clothes!


When these films feature men, on a regular basis, in hot pants, legs up at 90 degrees asking ‘Coffee?’ while being ogled by A list stars then surely this will be the time to talk in a reasonable manner about parity.


For now, the World Snooker Championship provides a highly respectable milieu for men to bed over tables.


In a strange quirk of fate this week my story Arse Licking for Beginners has been published over on Velvet Mafia. It consists of eight 200 words stories about… (Actually the last story grew slightly in length.)


Hang on, there’s someone at the door.


*Drew goes to door, opens it. Frankie Howard marches in, gives a twirl and goes back out.*


It is now 1 - 0 to Matthew Stevens.


I have written before about how I came to be writing erotic fiction here but I don’t know that my writing is erotic. It is basically the same kind of story with a big naked arse in it. That’s a tip for writers by the way.


Perhaps David Mackenzie is of the same mind. I watched his film, Hallam Foe, last night. Mackenzie has previously filmed the controversial erotic book Young Adam. Before Hallam Foe started there was a warning that the film contained very strong language and sex.


It didn’t actually although you did get to see Jamie Bell’s bum quite a lot.


It’s a brilliant film! Intelligent and odd and unusual and you never know where it’s going to go.


Hallam’s mother has died and he has retreated from the world to his treehouse with his binoculars. He likes to watch people, having sex, but it is not an erotic thing. He is trying to connect.


After an encounter with his step-mother he runs away to Edinburgh. He sees a woman who reminds him of his mother and he follows her, scooting across the rooftop of the city, hiding in a disused clock.


What could be quite an uncomfortable premise, is in fact not. Watch it.


And finally, although it doesn’t fit into this week’s theme of bums, but it is another part of the body.


*Good link Drew*


I went to see Elbow at Rock City this week. They were awesome, possibly the best concert I have ever seen. Guy Garvey is a great showman and entertainer. You can listen to him here.

Currently reading - Philip Pullman, Once Upon a Time in the North


Currently listening to - Guillemots, Red




Elbow - One Day Like This